The Way of Perfection · 16 of 46

Chapter 16: She begins to speak on mental prayer as compared with contemplation, etc

LET not all that I have been saying appear much to you, for as the saying is, “I am only setting the men for a game at chess.” You desired me to explain to you the beginning of prayer. I know no other, daughters, though God did not conduct me by this beginning, for I have scarcely the commencement of these virtues. Believe me, then, that whoever does not know how to place the men at chess, will not be able to play well; and if he know not how to give “check,” he will not know how to give “checkmate.” You may blame me for mentioning a game, which neither is, nor can be practised in this house. Here you see what a mother God has given you, skilled even in this vanity! But people say, “This game is lawful sometimes;” and how lawful would it be for us, and useful in some degree, to “checkmate” this Divine King, that so He might neither wish, nor be able to escape out of our hands! The queen puts him to the greatest difficulties in this game, and for this object all the other pieces help. Now no queen makes the king yield so soon as humility. This brought Him down from heaven into the womb of the blessed Virgin, and by means of it, we may with a hair bring Him into our soul. Believe me, that whoever has most humility, will possess Him most, and less he who has less. For I do not, and cannot understand, how there is or can be humility without love, or love without humility. And it is not possible that these two virtues should be in their perfection, without a great disengagement from all created objects.

You may ask me, my daughters, why I speak to you of these virtues, since you have plenty of books to teach you them? and you desire only to hear something on contemplation. I answer, that had you desired some discourse about “meditation,” I could have spoken on it, and advised all of you to use it, even though you have not the virtues; for it is a commencement towards obtaining all virtues, and a matter that concerns the souls of all Christians, if they wish to begin a new life; and hence, none, however abandoned they may be, whom God excites to so great a good, ought to neglect meditation, as I have elsewhere mentioned, and so have others who know what they write about, for God knows I do not. But, contemplation, daughters, is another thing. This is the mistake we all make, viz., that if any one accustom herself to think every day for a short time upon her sins (which every one ought to do, if he be a practical Christian), people immediately call her a great “contemplative,” and would have her instantly possess as high virtues, as he is bound to have who is eminent for contemplation, and even she herself imagines so too, but she is mistaken. She has not learnt at first to arrange the men; she thinks it is sufficient to know the pieces in order to “checkmate” but this is impossible, for the king will not give Himself up in the way we are speaking of, except to him who surrenders himself entirely into His hands.

Thus you see, daughters, if you wish me to tell you the way to arrive at contemplation, allow me to enlarge a little on things, which though they may not immediately seem to you to be so important, yet in my opinion they are so; and if you will not hear them nor practise them, continue all your life with your mental prayer, for I assure you and all who aspire to this happiness (though I may be mistaken, since I judge by myself, who have been endeavouring to obtain it these twenty years) that you will never attain to true contemplation.

I now wish to explain what mental prayer is, since some of you do not understand it – and God grant that we may practise it as it should be practised – but I fear it will be obtained with great labour, except those virtues be acquired (though not in so high a degree), which are necessary for contemplation. I say, the King of Glory will not come into our soul (I mean, will not be united with her), unless we strive to obtain eminent virtues. I will explain this point, because should you find me telling an untruth in anything, you will believe nothing; and you would have reason, if it were done wilfully. But may God deliver me from any such temptation – it must arise from ignorance, or want of understanding. I wish to mention, that sometimes God is pleased to bestow great favours on persons who are in a bad state, in order to advance them to contemplation, that so by this means He may snatch them from the power of the devil.

O my Lord! how often do we force You still to fight with the devil for us! Was it not sufficient that you allowed yourself to be grasped in his arms, when he carried you to the pinnacle of the temple, in order to teach us how to vanquish him? What a spectacle must it have been, daughters, to behold that Sun surrounded with darkness, and what fear must that wretch have had, without knowing whence it came? God did not allow him to understand it. Blessed be so much goodness and mercy! And how ought we Christians to blush, for making him every day (as I have said) encounter so foul a beast? It was very necessary, O Lord, you should have such strong arms; but did they not become weak by all those torments which you endured on the cross? O! how does all that is endured for love soon heal up again! And so I think, that had you continued alive, the mere love you had for us would have healed your wounds, and there would have been no need of any other medicine. O my God! who will apply such a medicine to me, in all such things as may cause me pain or trouble? how willingly would I bear these, if I were sure to be cured by so saving a remedy! But to return to what I was saying.

There are some souls which God knows He can attract to himself by such means; and though now He sees them quite lost, His majesty desires they may not remain for Him; and so though they be in a bad state, and destitute of virtues, He gives them caresses, consolations, and tenderness, which begin to excite desires; and sometimes He brings them even to contemplation, though this is seldom, and of short duration. This He does (as I have said), in order to make a trial of them, whether by that sweetness they will dispose themselves to enjoy him more frequently. But if they do not dispose themselves, let them pardon God for retiring from them; or, rather, do You pardon us, O Lord! for it is not indeed just, that You should come into a soul in this way, and that afterwards she should again have anything to do with creatures, so as to adhere to them. I am persuaded, that there are many of whom God makes a trial in this manner, and few there are who dispose themselves for enjoying such a favour. For when our Lord makes this trial, and we are no hinderance to it, I am certain that He never leaves off giving more favours, till He brings us to the highest degree. When we do not give ourselves up to His majesty, with the same determination that He gives Himself to us, He does enough in leaving us in Mental prayer, and visiting us from time to time, as servants who are working in his vineyard. But those others are His dear children, whom He wishes should be near Him; nor does He part with them, because they do not desire to leave Him. He makes them sit down at His table, and gives them part of his own food, so as to take (as the saying is) the morsel out of His own mouth, to give it to them.

O happy pains, my daughters! O blessed abandonment of things so small, and so base, which leads us to so high a dignity! Consider how little you will regard being blamed by the world, while you rest in the arms of God, who can deliver you from the whole world. He is powerful to free you perfectly, for once He commanded the world to be made, and it was made: His willing is acting. Fear not, then, unless it be for the greater good of those who love Him, that he will not allow you to be defamed: He does not love so imperfectly those who love Him. Why should we not, then, my sisters, show our love for Him as much as we can? Consider, that it is a fair exchange to give our love for His. Remember, He can do all things, and we, who are here, can do nothing at all, except what He enables us to do. Now what is this, O Lord, our Creator! which we do for You? As much as nothing – a poor feeble resolution. If then His majesty wishes us to purchase all things, with that which is a mere nothing, let us not become foolish.

O Lord! all our evils come from our not fixing our eyes upon Thee. If we considered only the way, we should soon arrive there; but we fall a thousand times, and stumble and stray from the way, by not fixing our eyes (as I said) on the true way. It seems never to have been trodden, for it looks so new to us. That is truly to be regretted, which sometimes happens; and therefore I say, we seem not to be Christians, nor to have read the passion in our life, since we cannot endure to be despised even in a trifle; nay, it seems impossible to be endured. They reply immediately; “We are not saints.” When we do something imperfect, may God deliver us, sisters, from saying – “We are not angels,” – “We are not saints.” Consider, that though we be not angels or saints, it is a great happiness to think that if we strive, we may be such by God’s assistance; and fear not that He will fail, if you fail not.

And since we have come here for no other purpose, let us set to work; let us not think there is anything, whereby our Lord may be served better, which we may not hope to succeed in, by His help. Such presumption I wish to see in this house, for it always makes humility increase, and produces a holy boldness; for God assists the valiant, and is no acceptor of persons. I have wandered much from my subject, and now wish to return to what I was saying. We must know what mental prayer is, and what contemplation is. It may seem foolish in me to speak on these subjects; but you do not mind, and you may, possibly, understand the subject better by my rude style, than by another more elegant. May our Lord grant me His assistance herein. Amen.